Ramblings of a Ringless Wife

Ringless Wife, Messy House, Cluttered Brain. All in a standard day.

January 23: “If I could Turn back time… If I could find a way…”

on January 24, 2012

What wold you do if you could turn back time and change an instance in your life?

I have a whole bucket load of things I think I would change, ranging from ex-boyfriends to cars to school to friends.

There are things I would avoid like the plague, and there are things that I didn’t do that I would if given another chance!

But If you were to change even a tiny, seemingly insignificant act that you did, what are the guarantees that you would end up where you are now, with what you have now, with who you have now? Whenever I think back over things that I would love to change, I begin to see them in a chain-like reaction.

I had a horrid break up with a man boy, which lead me to pick up sticks and high tail it over it to Albury. Moving to Albury meant I had a different life, but needed a job. The job I got is where I met Dan, and nearly 6 years on I have a life which has it stresses but is just about wonderful – even with the occasional murderous thought.

The job that I got which ultimately had me put on medication and undergoing psychotherapy has lead me to see that I am a strong person, and even when stacked up against a multi-national corporation I will fight it head on.

The “friends” I gained who kicked me in the teeth showed me the friends I had who would take me to the dentist.

I like to think that everything I have gone through, achieved, didn’t achieve, whatever, have led me to where I am in life now. Yes, I am stuck in the middle where money gets tight, but I have a nice house, I have Daniel, I have friends who would do anything for me, I have travelled, and I have done things that I wouldn’t have done if something else hadn’t of been the catalyst.

Now, don’t get me wrong, there are somethings I would change, but I know that these wouldn’t have an effect on todays life… damn you lead foot!

But the question is, as raised before, how do you know that you would be where you are if you changed something? How do you know that your values and morals would be the same or stronger if not for that one experience?

Every single thing in your life is a result of something you have done or haven’t done. Your kids are images of your values and morals, which have come from your experiences.

Something as innocuous a dying your hair may lead to an experience where you will never do it again, or it may get you that job which is your dream.

However, if you constantly spend your time living in the past, mulling over what you should or shouldn’t have done, you forget to live in today and nourish tomorrow.

I guess the moral to this blog is that everything leads you somewhere. Each experience you have in  your life is constantly moulding and shaping you into the person you need to be. Maybe some ideas and thoughts shouldn’t have been acted on, but what would you have if you hadn’t done them?

If you could change something, what would it be?
Do you think it would impact on your life today?



One response to “January 23: “If I could Turn back time… If I could find a way…”

  1. Mum says:

    Hadn’t of?????
    tsk tsk tsk..

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