Ramblings of a Ringless Wife

Ringless Wife, Messy House, Cluttered Brain. All in a standard day.

March 27: PCOS pt. 2

on March 27, 2012

The following is survey I had to fill out in order to help research in to PCOS.

When where you first diagnosed?
How old were you, when you were diagnosed?

How old are you now?

Had you heard about PCOS before your diagnosis?
Nope, and even after being diagnosed I still wasn’t sure. It wasn’t until Daniel and I began trying for a family that I began in-depth research

Looking back, what where your symptoms, before you were diagnosed?
My period was the only indicator – it was never regular and the cramps were so bad I woke up screaming thinking I was being stabbed.

Did you have any symptoms when you were younger?
I don’t know
What medications do you take, related to PCOS?
None, at the moment. I was put on Metformin which made me really ill and forgetful – I even forgot my dads birthday while I was on them.

If you take medications not related to PCOS, what are they, and what are they for?
Efexor for depression.

How are your symptoms now?
The lack of periods, Hirsutism [which is excess hair]

Is your doctor meeting your needs?
Not at this very stage as we are having to focus on other issues.

What are your biggest fears, about the PCOS?
A cyst getting  ruptured and giving me blood poisoning. The slightly higher likelihood of cancer. The insulin resistance. But the biggest one is not being a mother.

Have you switched to an Endocrinologist?
Nope. My doctor and I are working on a plan to see if a drug will help me before heading to the Endocrinologist.

What meal/exercise plan works well for you?
None. I start off really well and then get all depressed and moody.

Do you want children?
Yes. My partner and I have been trying for over four years.

If you do/don’t, how do you feel about other women, who don’t have PCOS, that do/don’t want children?
Jealousy, thy name is Me. Angry, resentful, hurt, depressed, jealous, envious. It took me a long time to get to a point where I can be devastated for me but happy for them. I still sometimes struggle with it.

If at all, how has your relationships changed with your friends and relatives, since your diagnosis?
It didn’t while I was younger. But now it tends to make me hate myself and my body with a passion. People don’t talk to me about babies or ask when we are having family any more. And a lot of people won’t tell me that they’re pregnant because they know it shatters me.  I have found a lot of new friends whom understand what I’m feeling and how much I hate my body, and I also have friends with PCOS who have babies, so that provides some beacon of hope.
I am also the “go-to” person now for people who have been diagnosed and want information as I have been researching it for so many years.

The hard part about the above survey was that It only scratched the surface of how I feel, and it didn’t ever come into about how it affects my day to day life. It doesn’t go into the heartbreak and pain that you live with and smother every single day.


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