Ramblings of a Ringless Wife

Ringless Wife, Messy House, Cluttered Brain. All in a standard day.

January 10th: A weighty issue.

It’s been three days since I started back on my diet.

Three long, boring, tasteless, craving-full days.

But – I haven’t cracked. No, not once. And I am so proud of myself.

Im back to weighing my foods, and calorie counting, and drinking a whole lot more fluid, and tonight I’m feeling fairly good! I went shopping hungry and instead of going straight for the Deli for Kabana and the dairy for a Kiewa, I went and got rye biscuits and a tomato – and boy, was it yummy when I got home!

However, while three days doesn’t seem very long at all, to a woman who loves her KFC, Maccas, Pizza, any fast food really, it’s been ages.

I need to credit my weight loss group, Biggest Loser Mini Motivators, for keeping me strong, listening to my whingeing, and providing healthy alternatives when I have had none.

Including my Tamika, whom you have all heard about, encouraging me and getting me to try new things,  there have been two other ladies who have helped enormously by getting me out for a walk today. I won’t mention names, as Im not sure how they would feel about it. But if you read this, Thank you very much, for pushing me and getting me out of the house.

The page and the women on it have been great – always full of ideas, support, encouragement and knowing exactly where I am coming from and how hard it is. They never judge, belittle or question your eating for the day, but just encourage you to maybe make a better choice, or supplement this for that, and sometimes help the most by saying nothing.

Everyone in our group is there for the same reason – we are there to lose weight, get healthy, see results and find who we want to be… but I think we all are going to gain some wonderful friends, and have some amazing sounding boards for a long time yet.

It has only been three days but I have shared more with some women about my issues than I have with many other people. I have someone to say, “You know what? I could kill someone for a hot chip sanga as well!” and that makes me feel good. I like knowing that someone understands where I am coming from and isn’t judging me for it.

Every body in our group is doing so well. They’re all making different choices, and trying new things, and I am really excited for our weigh in next Sunday. I know that even if I dont get the loss I am after, there is going to be people to help me through and support me, encourage me, allow me to cry and then help me wipe the tears.

It feels amazing to be part of a small community, where I am not “Her daughter” or “His Partner”, But just plain old Kloi-Jayd, battling the same demons as everyone else and fighting for what I want.

If any of the ladies from the group happen to read this: Thank you. Thank you for everything.

And to Tamika, who took a seed of an idea and has worked tirelessly into making it come to fruition, Thank you. We have made an amazing team.

For anyone interested, our group is based in Albury/Wodonga and you can get information at:

http://www.facebook.com/groups/135338876578748/

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January 8th: Finding the Motivation in a dodgy day.

Today has been a day where I have had to search hard to find the meaning of all the kicks.

It started off with waking up feeling ill, which isn’t that uncommon an occurrence anyway.

But my weightloss meeting, while good for Tamika and I as facilitators, was disastrous for me as an individual. I came away feeling like a huge-assed Heffalump.

I came home and slept away my misery until It was time to facilitate the second meeting in Wodonga. I spent the whole time trying to be happy and bubbly but with a head pounding like I had Woody Wood-Pecker in residence it wasn’t easy!

Eating dinner was another disaster – 1/2 a mouthful had me dashing for the loo and I was sick everywhere.

After a call to mum where I just whined, I snuggled in bed with my Berhurt and  my Cat, ready to watch Scrubs.

In enters Tamika, who gets me around there for a coffee.

I was feeling so low about the day as a general that when I smashed my iPhone screen outside her house I honestly didn’t think my day could get any freakin’ worse, and I was almost numb about it. With some help from her hubby Vinny and nifty phone case from Meeka, I (By which I mean Vinny) was able to salvage my phone into usability. THANK YOU VINNY!!!

I spent a good two hours around there, during which we talked and I whinged, and Meeka lifted my spirits up with a good old bitch session, which always seems to help! (Yes, I know, I am a woman; I have DNA which allows the bitchiness!)

Meeka pointed out that my weight at this point is only a number, and it will drop. It feels as though she has made herself my personal motivator, and for that I am grateful; She also said That everything that had happened today did not qualify for it to be an “FML” day, because as I have previously blogged, there are many worse off than me and to follow my own preachings.

Having someone there to listen to me, and understand why I was so devastated really helped. She really was great for picking me up out of my doldrums, and, lets face it, her perfect cuppa really did help!

It’s funny, isn’t it, how just sitting down and having a cuppa with your bestie can help alter your outlook. Do you have friends who do this for you? It is days like today where I appreciate those who have time for that cuppa with me, and who show me what I can achieve when I put my mind to it.

I am working really hard at finding the motivation from todays weigh in, where I weighed in at a humungous 127 KG.
The group Tamika and I have developed is all about motivation – I cannot facilitate a group about motivation when I lack it for myself.

I am going to beat “the battle of the bulge”. I am going to get back to where I should be, and where I want to be.

I am not going to go back into my former shell and just comfort eat anything that smells good. I haven’t even had one of my coffee milks today, Momma!

With my KuppyKake by my side, and my future families life in mind, I will do anything.

Hugs and Mushy Stuff,
K xo

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